I run into people on the street and ask “what’s happenin ?” they usually respond with “Oh I’m so busy”. And then sometimes they continue by telling me all the many things they are busy doing. Aren’t we all like this? Just so very busy. We feel important when we list all the things we are doing or planning to do.
Yes, busy can feel great. We can feel productive, satisfied, and emotionally and intellectually engaged in the business of life. This kind of busy seems to energize us, but as Marc Lesser, author of Less: Accomplishing More by Doing Less, states, the other kind of busy; crazy, non-stop, over-the top, busy, leaves us bored, overwhelmed and filled with a sense of failure. If we are unhappy, busyness makes a convenient excuse not to acknowledge what’s not working in our careers and/or our relationships.
What and who would we be if we weren’t busy?
Perhaps it’s time to consider that question a bit more seriously.
In my work as a nurse-therapist, I encounter many people who can no longer be busy due to some form of debilitating illness, be-it physical or mental/emotional. When they find themselves unable to be busy, to spend their days doing, they sometimes feel useless and unimportant. If the situation persists , they may become angry, and frustrated.
Could it be that when we so strongly identify more with what we do, and the act of doing, than with whom we are, our be-ingness, we lose a sense of having value for who we are?
Could we experience having a sense of our value and importance in just being? And if so, do we have to be incapacitated to experience this?
Or might one willingly choose to stop, get quiet and experience just being for a while.
STOP THE WORLD I WANNA GET OFF
So, here we are… too busy, stressed, and tired. What to do? We’ll take a vacation!
We go somewhere, we just have to see all the sights, one night here, 2 nights there, take the tour, do all the recommended activities, it’s fun, but now we’re exhausted, we’ve spent way too much money, and it’s time to get back to work. But we really didn’t get a break from our habit of ‘being busy’.
Have you ever felt like you needed a vacation after your vacation?
Right? You are so exhausted you find yourself pining for more time off— just to rest and relax.
Back in the early 70’s there was a show on Broadway called “Stop the world I wanna get off” This seems to be precisely how we sometimes feel during our hectic lives.
I would like to propose an antidote to our, over- scheduled, always- connected – to- some form of technology, fast- paced lives. The antidote is retreat. Yes, retreat.
The following definitions are the closest I’ve found to describing what I have come to know as a retreat.
Retreat:
- a place of privacy; a place affording peace and quiet
- a place of refuge, seclusion, or privacy.
- a place of privacy or safety : REFUGE
- a period of group withdrawal for prayer, meditation, study, or instruction under a director.
- withdrawal for prayer and study and meditation; “the religious retreat is a form of vacation activity”
- the act of withdrawing, as into safety or privacy; retirement; seclusion.
There is no typical or average retreat. Retreats, like people, come in all shapes and sizes.
Marc Lesser names a few types
Personal Retreat: People go on retreat to renew and reflect, to re-group, re-examine their life after job loss, or when recovering from an illness. During this time one can connect with their spiritual nature through quiet prayer and contemplation. This type may be done alone or with a group.
Staff or management Retreat: Gather together in a quiet, secluded environment to build trust, create strategies and strengthen your shared vision.
Family Retreat: Perhaps a novel idea, if not challenging. But well worth the effort. Consider creating a way for your family to spend time together without all the toys, technology and distractions of a typical vacation. Camping, kayaking, fishing, sitting around a campfire telling stories, or other varieties of outdoor activities can provide a supportive and refreshing environment instead of the families’ usual pace.
Weekly Sabbath: This type of retreat is found in many religious traditions. This idea honors the wisdom of taking one day ‘off’ per week as a Sabbath or day of mindfulness—this means not participating in usual daily activities, such as shopping working computer and TV use. Some people use this day for rest, self-care and quiet reflection. What a good way to re-juvenile on a regular basis.
Some things that one may be more aware of while on retreat:
- Change of pace, slows us down, we tune in to ourselves and our surroundings .
- Finding a new perspective
- Get to know your wild and busy mind. Practice awareness of breath and meditation.
- Become aware of the patterns of your thoughts and feelings.
- Finding your center
- Refresh and renew let go of the worry and watch the thoughts …allow for the place of not knowing. Of joy and refreshment.
- Notice and blend the sacred and the mundane
- Let go of expectations
- Gently re-enter and re-create your world…re-boot!
Sound interesting? Perhaps something you would like to try, but you’re wondering how, where, and when?
This August there is a great opportunity for experiencing this un-busyness. It’s called The Summer Retreat.
Its happening August 7th-12th. Beautiful Byfield, Massachusetts, north of Boston.
Year after year people come from all over the world to gather for this extraordinary week.
This is not a religious retreat. There will be teachings about Tibetan Buddhist ideas, many of which are unique in the world, they are not being taught to promote Buddhism, but because they work. They enhance every religious tradition.
Going on retreat has helped me in so many ways. When my heart was shattered with grief, I found solace, and deep quiet in which to rest and heal. I found wise Teachings that helped me re-set my spiritual center. I found a safe place to just ‘be’ for awhile.
I highly recommend really getting away this summer. This retreat is a good way to begin to experience “accomplishing more by doing less”
Ah, the antidote to busyness…Retreat -Anita
To learn more about The Summer Retreat, click here.
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